Surprise! There’s More Than One Right Way

Posted on Aug 14, 2018 Topic : Inspirational/Devotional, Women's Christian Living
Posted by : Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory

When I was 14, I volunteered as a Big Buddy for five-year-old Suzie, a cancer patient at the local hospital. One day Suzie declared, “I’m going to draw a tree!” and grabbed a purple crayon. Purple? I have no artistic talent whatsoever, but I know drawing a tree requires two colors, and neither one is purple.

Purple. Who ever heard of a purple tree? True to my Driver personality, I reached over, yanked the purple crayon out of her hand, found the brown crayon, and thrust it at her.

I saw my supervisor beckoning to me. She invited me to join her on the far side of the room, where she spoke in a conspiratorial whisper. “What if we…let her draw a purple tree?”

I stared back at her. Let her draw a purple tree? Of all the audacious, impudent, bold ideas. We could let her draw a purple tree. Yes! Yes, as a matter of fact, we could.

I marched back across the room, snatched the brown crayon out of Suzie’s hand, and quickly replaced it with the original purple crayon, announcing victoriously, “You can draw a purple tree!”

For the first time in my life, it occurred to me that my way might not be the only way.

Did you know God offers a different right way?

God beckons us, inviting, "What if we..."

Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many… in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!”
(1 Corinthians 12:14, 18-21).

I’ve wasted decades and damaged many relationships living as if I, on my own, am the body. My attitudes and behaviors have said far more clearly than words, “I don’t need you!” to my husband, my children, my friends, and my students.

God wants us to expand our tunnel vision. To become open to others’ points of view. To recognize the value of their ideas, thoughts, and preferences. To actively seek their input rather than relying solely on our own perspectives.

God is clear: we do need each other.

So how do we right wrong priorities?

“I don’t mean to tell you what to do, but…” rolls so effortlessly off my tongue. The bumper stickers on my life proclaim, “If it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right” and “My way or the highway.” Learning to stop fixating on how I think things should be done and start opening up to other options has been a slow process.

If you’re struggling with the same tendencies, here are two simple (but not necessarily easy) choices you can make that can help you develop greater openness and become your own kind of brave:

Seek Confirmation That You’re Doing the Right Things: When you can’t come up with good reasons for what you’re doing, it’s a red flag that you’re being driven by fear. The one core choice of becoming your own kind of brave reminds us that love wins over fear any day.
Expand Your Definition of Doing Things Right: Letting go of control is hard. But in the core choice of becoming your own kind of brave, it’s right. practice openness with this new mindset: “I’d rather be happy with others than ‘right’ alone.”

Remember, you can choose happiness over being right every time. And you can start with prayer.

When faced with a conflict between being right and demonstrating respect in a relationship, seek guidance by praying, Am I focused on doing things right or doing the right things? and Am I insisting on being the entire body or am I doing my part? Then be open to the Holy Spirit’s conviction and leading.