Following God’s Way of Forgiveness

Posted on Jun 25, 2019 Topic : Men's Christian Living, Women's Christian Living
Posted by : Lauren Dungy

When I was ten years old, I did something unkind to my brother, Averell. It was a hot summer day and he had claimed the last Coke in the refrigerator. I asked him to share it with me, but he refused. When he was distracted by a knock at the door, I decided to help myself to a few sips. He immediately noticed and was upset. I knew it was wrong, so I apologized. I expected him to say, “That’s OK. It’s not a big deal.”

But to my surprise, he was very upset, and it took him a long time to get over it. It seems silly now, but for the longest time all I wanted was for him to forget about my actions and forgive me.

Looking back, I shouldn’t have been critical of him being upset because I often find myself doing the same thing. Someone will do something that hurts my feelings and it takes me a long time to get over it. Sometimes the person doesn’t even realize they’ve offended me. But I can hold on to the hurt and even let it hinder a relationship with someone I love.

The Bible says we can’t let that happen. Life is all about relationships and because we are not perfect, even people who love us are going to do things that hurt our feelings.

The question is, “How will we respond when we are hurt?”

Colossians 3:13a says “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you." The first thing we have to do is understand that even the godliest people we know are not going to be perfect. They are going to do things that we might not think are right. But if that happens, we are to be gracious and loving. We are to explain to that person why we were offended.

Then the verse says we have to forgive anyone who offends us. That’s very straightforward and most of us who read this passage would understand that it’s not just good advice, it’s a command. God expects us to forgive each other.

Knowing we should forgive doesn’t make it any easier, especially when it’s something that really stings us. Our response is, “I can forgive a lot of things, but I can’t forgive that!”

The second half of verse 13 has the perfect answer. "Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” God has forgiven us, and not just of the small, insignificant things— He has forgiven us of everything. Jesus died on the cross so that we would be forgiven of every offense we have ever committed against God or our fellow man, without hesitation and with no exceptions.

Whatever we have done and whatever our motivation was, He forgives us. And He expects us to do the same. However, it’s just not in our human nature to do that. We have to ask Jesus to let His Spirit take over our lives to allow us to forgive that way. And if we do, we will see the benefits. Not only will we be able to experience God’s forgiveness more fully, we will enjoy our relationships with people without being hindered by the hard feelings that come from holding a grudge.

That’s why God wants us to forgive others—not for their benefit, but for ours.

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This lesson isn't just for adults. Help your child learn the biblical value of forgiveness.